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LESBIAN, GAY, BISEXUAL,
QUESTIONING YOUNG PEOPLE
GENDER DIVERSE YOUNG PEOPLE
RESOURCES AND REFERENCES
Will my child or loved one still have a good life with loving relationships?
Being LGBQ is not a barrier to a happy life. Many families worr y that their LGBQ child
is in for a lonely or difficult life, but the opposite may be true. While most LGBQ people
encounter discrimination or social exclusion at some point, this is not likely to be a
dominant par t of their life. In fact, a lot of LGBQ people find it easy to make friends and
find par tners because LGBQ communities offer so many oppor tunities to connect with
others. More likely, your child or loved one will be surrounded by friends and in time,
develop romantic relationships that are meaningful and fulfilling. Of course, they might
also have the typical trials and tribulations that all people experience when negotiating
romantic relationships. You can help your child or loved one have a good life by being
suppor tive and including them, their friends and par tner(s) in your family.
... her life has been far from lonely.
John, 66, VIC
Our family’s religion forbids homosexuality. How can I accept my child or loved
one and still maintain my faith?
Many religions have strict views about homosexuality and it can be seen as sinful
or going against religious teachings. Strong religious beliefs can present an extra
complexity for LGBQ people and their families. There are no simple answers as to how
people can resolve conflicting beliefs about religion and sexuality. Some LGBQ people
feel confident that spiritually, they are who they’re meant to be and they’re able to
maintain their religious practices and beliefs. Other people may find spiritual fulfilment
within new organisations or networks with fellow LGBQ people of faith. For some LGBQ
people, religion and sexuality are hard to integrate and they become disconnected from
Some families worr y that by accepting that their child or loved one is LGBQ, they are
encouraging a life without faith. Alternatively they may worr y they will have to give up
their own faith, but this is not the case. You can search for other people with similar
experiences to you on the internet or through community organisations. Within LGBQ
communities, there are many suppor t, social and prayer groups from a range religions
that may be helpful.
I’m worried this will bring shame on my culture or community.
Some cultures are more inclusive and familiar with LGBQ people and issues than
others, but it’s wor th remembering that diverse sexualities are found in all races,
cultures and religions. While some people within your community may be against
homosexuality, others will be more inclusive. Never theless, if you fear that your
culture or community will find it difficult to accept or understand the sexual identity
of your child or loved one, you may feel isolated and unsure where to turn for suppor t.
Sometimes, people find it useful to look outside their close community to find
information and suppor t. Again, the internet can be a good place to find information and
you can also consult the suppor t groups and Resources and references at the back of
this guide. Remember, sexuality is nothing to be ashamed about. You, your child or loved
one have done nothing wrong. If your feelings of shame are over whelming, talking about
them to a professional counsellor, perhaps outside of your local community, may be useful.
Did I do something wrong?
We do not know what determines sexuality. Many people feel that they were born gay,
lesbian, or bisexual even if they do not realise this until they are older. What we do know
is that LGBQ people are raised in all types of families, societies and cultures. There is
no evidence that different parenting styles have a bearing on the sexuality of children or
that anything parents do influences their child’s sexuality. Try to remember that there is
nothing wrong or abnormal about being LGBQ. There is no one to blame and it’s no one’s
fault when it comes to human sexuality. Sexuality and diversity are a natural par t of life.
Always be there and display your love and support.
Listen to [your child] and their feelings.
John, 66, VIC
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